So long that I am turned away from light,
I see a spectre, my own shadow -
My darkness, lying beside something bright,
Like a gloomy, veiled widow.
I turn to the light, my shadow takes flight,
I face the source of my eternal glow.
The shadow exists, but is out of sight,
And stretched ahead of me is a divine meadow.
I turn my sight away from that source,
Shadowy spectres still outline my course,
But when I fix my gaze upon what is right,
Undeterred by shadows, I see light.
---
100 comments:
it is wonderful.. :)
just one word..
Stupendous...
awesomely written..
Amazing re ..
Shadow can be used as a metaphor for so many things "spirit , conscience / personality " and many more - whatever it is - it Defines us :)
beautiful poem, lovely sentiments.
Shadow and light - yes. A metaphor for evil and good, perhaps?
Love Gail
peace.....
A simple lesson, clothed in beautiful metaphor!
beautiful beautiful :D
the fourth line of first verse reminded of this song: listen listen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmDcCh862Do
Undeterred by shadow, I see light...
Amazing peice.. Just simply awesome, I loved it!
*piece
i like the last line... but somehow it felt very unlike u!!! wonder why??????
I liked the main element of the poem, Karthik! :)
Well, somehow I have never had a penchant for rhymes and something like this, coming from you, has intrigued me, just like @Diva pointed out! I personally felt that the words didn't carry the intensity with which you write, usually!
I would like to make a suggestion. Please cut out the simile and use a metaphor in the last line of the first stanza. 'Like', I am afraid, doesn't provide a smooth flow to the poem.
Keeps the great words flowing! Cheers!
is that u??
Different face of kartz..
like the last lyns...gr8
shadows, light and right. i have loved the way u have played with these words.
such deep message u hv conveyed with this poem. what ever is right will always be surrounded by light.
Outstanding work dude !
LOVED the last stanza. :)
Cheers
liked ur use of the word - shadow... nice poem mister...
hmmm... out of the darkness..?
##Richa
Danke... :)
##Pallav
Gratias...
##Arnav
:) Define, it does...
##Gail
Not necessarily, ma'am... Darkness is absence of light. And well, who knows what it hides unless you throw light, dispel it and find out?
But yeah, the reader does have his/her opinion. Thanks.
##Usha Ma'am
Thank you ma'am! :)
##Asbah
Thanks for the song, and the read. Lovely piece of music, must say. :) And yeah, thanks for sharing the lyrics too!
##Netika Lumb
Thanks. Good to see you again...
##Diva
Dunno... This was just a reflection. As a kid, I was amused by the word - shadow. And thanks to Fantasy-genre games/books, the intrigue just grew...
Would like to hear your take though - as to how it seems different.
Good to hear from you. Trust all is well.
##Ranjani
Ha ha! Well, it is rare that I write stuff that do not rhyme. Very rare... Well, just that, I find my compositions incomplete if they don't rhyme. Rhyming isn't easy either...
Initially, I'd be satisfied if the metre was ABCB/ABAC, but now, it has to be one of AABB/ABAB/AAAA/AABCB... ...
Point noted. Thanks. Will fiddle around for something better. And yeah, guess it didn't hit hard. But then again, that wasn't the intent. Rustiness - having come back to blogsville after a fortnight. ;P
How are things, btw..?
##Amrita
Ummm, no, this is a creature from the bowels of the nether-realm. ;D
##Preetilata
Thank you... Glad you liked it.
##Isha
Thanks for the kind words, mademoiselle...
##Anonymous
Thanks Mr./Mrs./Miss./?
##Rishi
Well... Journey into the darkness.
##Rishi
Well... Journey into the darkness.
Shadow- Fear and following the path unknown.
thot provokin, as evr...
neat stuff, mate... keep up the gd wrk..!!!
- dc
light!!! ahhhh..m waiting for my light too..its kept me waiting 4 long now :(
beautiful lines there kartz..super! :))
awesome! as usual.
Im bak Kartz :)
Keshi.
just one word... "beautiful"... loved it!!
A rare visualisation
Good to see u write like this.
Yes, the 3 faces of life and the fourth shows light at the end of the tunnel? Am I right?
kavidhai ..
arumai
arumai.. naan indha kavidhaiya copy adichu , manapaadam panni , appadiyae moonu figureala vula vaikala...
www.chronicwriter.com
hats off to the righteousness!
you come with a bang of beauty :D
whao whao
i see light after such a long time!
But when i fix my gaze upon what is right..
Undetteerd my shadows I see light..
Lovely lines thr..
n very well rhymed..:)
#Kudos#
profound reflections...
Its Lovely!
:)
guess all adjectives ve been used up... nice. liked the underlying theme...
beautiful metaphor,...i loved the way u guised the darkness as the gloomy widow!! :) absolutely loved it kartz!!!
hope allz well at ur end!! God bless!!!
##Priya
The path unknown - I took the one less travelled by, and tht has made all the difference. :)
##Obsidian
Thanks for the read...
##Anonymous/dc
Danke...
##Trinaa
The light is inside you. Why are you searching for it elsewhere..?
##Keshi
Thank you. So good to have you back.
Trust all is well with you...
##mona
Gratias...
##jayaram
Thank you, uncle...
Well, yes - that is a way of looking at it too. Glad you liked it.
We do have light within. It is up to us to find it, bask in it and realize our purpose...
##Chriz
Ha ha... ;) Good luck!
Ummm, last bittu purile. Please elucidate. Moonu figurea? (My brand of Tamil is understood only by my folks! ;p )
Thanks for the read, bro'...
##Kajal
Thank you for the read...
##Seher Di
Glad you do... :)
##Charzz
Thank you for the kind words.
Welcome to Contorted Reality. I appreciate your time to stop by and leave a note. Hope to see you often.
Peace.
##Helm's Deep
Thanks... LOTR fan, I see?
##Gauri Mathur
Thank you...
##Overmind
Thank you...
Yes, I am a member at G-Arena too. DoTA/TFT/StarCraft/AoE... Yourself?
##Sashu
Thank you for the kind words. Good to see you again.
Yes, I am well, thank you. Trust all is well at your end, too.
Good day.
Where there is much light, the shadow is deep..!!
But when I fix my gaze upon what is right,
Undeterred by shadows, I see light.
Liked it..
superb one Kartz..
great thougt.. I enjoyed this one :)
nice thoughts... well framed...
Not much of strategy... Prefer FPS. CoD, et al...
I know rhyming isn't easier! I just said I dont have a penchant for that! :))
BTW, I have started reading Life of Pi by Yann martel! So far, so good. Try laying your hands on it!
Cheers!
Sheer roo-bish... Get a life, mate.
##Sophie
Thank you. Good to see you again...
##kanagu
Thanks dude... Glad you liked it.
##Anonymous
Gratias... U cd at least leave ur name.
##Overmind
Naaaaa... Just can't stand all those gunshots. :P
##Ranjani
Oh yeah, I did notice that in the few poems you've shared thus far. Well, we have our own styles, don;t we? :)
Life of Pi - yeah, shelf le irukku. Not in the mood to read books these days. ;)
##Anonymous
How boo-rish. :P
And yeah, I do need one. Thanks though, I wdnt want urs. Even if u had an overdose of it.
Kartz-dark,subterranean,deep.
I like the positive lines at the end.
As the poet said-''subah zaroor aayegi,subah ka intezar kar''
whoa!!!!!!!!
bro, was looking for positive vibes and i got it here.. not sure if u intended to give out the glow, but i feel good now :)
Excellent kartz...
wonderful stuff...
thanks for the correction..(my last post)i have edited it..
wishes.....
take care
Remember something in one of ur older compositions - the alluring beauty in darkness...
Nicely penned...
De Profundis!!
where there is shadow, there is obviously light.. good one, but from what i know, you can better.. :)
Nice blog. Only the willingness to debate and respect each other’s views keeps the spirit of democracy and freedom alive. Keep up the good work. Hey, by the way, do you mind taking a look at this new website www.indianewsupdates.com. It has various interesting sections. You can also participate in the OPINION POLL in this website. There is one OPINION POLL for each section.
Kindly note: The comments section is having problems so you may not be able to comment right now but it will available in a few days. We are also planning to get Live Cricket in our website within this week.
Kindly go through the entire website. Who knows, it might just have the right kind of stuff that you are looking for. If you like this website, can you please recommend it to at least 5 of your friends. Your little help would help us in a big way.
Thank you,
The Future Mantra
##jayu
:) You captured what I meant, Auntie! Thank you!
##mayz
Thank you for the read, bro'.
Welcome to Contorted Reality. I appreciate your time to stop by and leave a note.
See you around.
Peace.
##Anil
Not a prob, bro'. Glad you felt good on reading it.
##MIP
Thank you for the read! And please, no formalities.
##Priya Joyce
Gratias... And welcome back.
##Lena
Oh yes! This really is way way off my best. But had to pen down what came to mind. :)
Thank you for the read, buddy...
##Jake
Thanks, mate. Good to see u again...
##future mantra
Thank you for visiting. I appreciate your time.
This was SOME BRILLIANT thought !! completely bowled me !! :)
simple, yet profound... Keep at it!
Its on occasions like these when daali is proud of her lil boi :D *tickles*
of course, if we see what is right, our direction or angle won't matter.
This can also moralise that: we must never lose sight of our source(of wealth/health/..) ie. our roots
##Pratibha
Thank you for stopping-by to leave a note. Welcome to Contorted Reality. I appreciate your time.
Peace. Have a nice day.
##Anonymous
Thanks for the read.
##Ayushi
Merci beaucoup, mademoiselle. And yes, we must remember our roots.
could so much relate to the first 2 paras.. ..the last line..what my heart always thrive for is still a distant dream..but i do dream to 'just do the right.. and face light..undeterred by shadows :) nice flow of thoughts
##verbivoreI am so glad u cd relate to it. And I wish for ur *distant dreams* to become a reality. Thank you for the read, ma'am. :)
I really dont knw how people write poetry so well.. really this is awesome... after reading some from other blogs.. i tried to write.. i was just horrible at it.. u ve got talent..keep it up.
Poetry
##workhard
Well, it is all about application and going with the flow. As your screen-name says - work hard. I am sure you'll come up with one very soon. Hoping to read it, too... :)
Thank you for the kind words...
LOL... thanx for the encouragement buddy but dont go by my id.. thats only for misleading.. i barely work hard ;)
Thank me later, ma'am. :)
And I mean it. Just follow your instincts and go with the flow. :)
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